The Up & Coming Nightmare City Sessions

by Jordan Thornquest

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1.
What will I do When I finally get bored of you? The excitement melts away... Where will I go When it all has to go somewhere It was nice while it lasted We had such good dreams Of things that we’d be And we did them all too quickly We had such big plans That slipped through our hands When we put them all over And ran out of room to cover What will I do when I finally get bored of you? Will it all break off easy Where will it go When we’ve gone as far up as we can And now it has to crash & land
2.
Asking why we sell our feelings Is only step one, believe me, we’ve all moved on I’d happily pay to hear what you think That’s connection after all And you’ll leave something when you’re gone Validation is inspiration Strength for my generation Catching up So we can prepare to move along My thoughts, might not, Have any way to change you But this might shake your body And help rearrange you I heard this man Tell me art could never make change It’s only reflection I don’t disagree But like his words, it gave me direction for me So many times, I’d never been healed Knowing feeling scared was something everyone feels But then the right one screamed, “LOVE IS WORRY,” And then my fate was finally sealed
3.
On an unassuming day in October, The Little Red House was crushed where it stood And the apartment complex took over the corner block Rent starts at $1500 for a one bedroom Get in line The new locals are surprised there’s not new art, like there used to be Lots of young people in the coffee shops, like you & me After all, look how nice the streets are And no homeless people anywhere, lucky me I could bring my kids here Nice place Classic city mismanagement Plus overzealous architects Old news, the old one’s crumbled News flash, your city’s next Kinda wild, you can see festivals getting bigger every year But there aren’t any new local bands, Wonder why It’s almost like the people who want to make a living off of music Can’t afford to get by I was on a road trip somewhere new with my best friend, turned to him and said, I wanna work part time, minimum wage, by myself, and preferably more than half dead He looked and told me, this city isn’t for me, and at that point, which one is? You find one town with out a scene Or a miracle rising in the west But call it yours, and once it’s big, you guessed it, That city’s next (He improvised verse 3)
4.
Fuck parades They’re only a roadblock from where you need to get to Like gettin’ to work to serve the crowd that storms in after the parade’s done I drove through one in desperation to clock in on time Pulled over by a cop on a bicycle Why didn’t I just drive away? You got a Jeep with seven tickets And a sign on the meter Says You’ve got 10 grand and no plans Let’s fucking go I appreciate the sentiment The energy of feeling spent Biting at the heels of a looming Legal imminence I appreciate the sentiment He’s just tryin’ They’re just tryin’ Making livings while we’re dying From folks making livings out of dying And it put me in the headspace Blaming others for the rat race It’s not the man in front of me It’s numbers that his face makes Runnin’ through conversion stats And runnin’ ads Next kid in line, looked like he dreamed Of seeing jobs end just like me Evidence of class wars schemes And stereotypes of teenage dreams Shaggy shave, nose pierced, eyes glazed A dollar short, and I made a pass To take the drinks, and joke about Burning this whole building down His eyes got wide, his face grew worried I got tense politely hurried them along Another zoomer I got wrong Another punk kid an angry old man put in the words of a song who’s just tryin’ He’s just tryin’ They’re just tryin’ Making livings while we’re dying From folks making livings out of dying What is it that you know or don’t know That makes you think things are going well What is it that you know or don’t know That makes you think things are going well What do you have, what are you hiding That life is just a river you’re riding Your feet are dry, I’ve swallowed salt Everyone posts suicide on their alts Inviting death, on our alts Stoned to stillness, on our alts Ease the numbness, on our alts It’s not their faults, it’s not their faults It's not our fault!
5.
City of trees And a pleasant breeze Almost forget I’m in the middle of a desert Come for the scene Stay for the dream Of settlin’ down And makin’ old jokes about the weather I shake off invitations For making new relations Stupid higher purpose Canceling vacations ‘Cause I’m here on business, Not making friends I have no interest in your city No money for your trends ‘Cause I’m runnin’ low on time 20 years left in my prime Before my efforts are exceptions Or I find some new directions I’ve been stuck in here for hours In a old shop Distracting me from work I’ve self-imposed Pleasure Is only a distraction Like a catholic in reservation But instead of God, it’s an art attraction Every second I’m taking breaks Is like a regrettable afterglow It was better in the moment And now I need to go GO GO GO!
6.
I’m always discovering things You’ve known about myself for years Every thing that I’ve been going through Is gonna be worth the tears I know, I know, I know My inner conflict is never your fault But I still feel like I’m a kid With feelings taken with a grain of salt Everybody says Nobody’s figured it out But should I feel like I’ve barely even started Spending years along the route Thanks for your patience Thank you for waiting up One day I’ll be keeping the pace Today I’ll just be keepin’ up Protagonist syndrome Rejection of roles A fear of mediocrity An enormous addiction to goals You wanna make an impact You wanna be in somebody’s head When they don’t care ‘bout your taste or your skillset Your self-worth is even more dead The things I demand from others are correctly labeled flaws Dependency, worship, imitation, applause I can feel my friends shaking their heads Because they already know You’re still seeking pity You’re still growin’ up, And you've still got a long way to go!
7.
Jenny’s got a bottle of wine in her hand Dylan’s crying through his favorite band Michael’s got his headset on & the evening to himself Sara’s got vacation in 300 days Aaron’s got a gig that finally pays The rent is overdue, it’s not enough to do But it’s the least they can do for themselves Self care, it’s a cliche now Two words, you haven’t figured out There’s so much to fear And always something to keep you down Sugar and sleep Getting too deep A secret to keep A minute to weep And pushing your pulse to the edge of your skin Anything to feel like you’re still livin’ Are you shaking? Well I’m shakin’ too Are you breaking? Or just makin’ do Are you takin’ Any time for you Are you aching? In your body again Feeling useless Away your friends What’s your something To comfort you in spite Of it all (Despite everything, it’s still you) All’s well while it’s ending

about

In 2019, I moved to Boise, Idaho. I had a very bad time. I wrote songs while I was there.

I don't love these, but I think they capture and pinpoint a very specific sense of frustration and desperate drive to do... Something. To want something other than whatever the hell was happening there.

I might do something with some of these, someday. For now, here's the angry young man who learned a lot by leaving a podunk haven. Let's see if it sticks.

Up & coming's a curse. Your city's next.

credits

released April 4, 2021

Me! I made all of it! It's a miracle!

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Jordan Thornquest Twin Falls, Idaho

Jordan Thornquest maps his mindstate with theatrical relish & a form of punk-informed power pop that's both candidly introspective and fearlessly extroverted.

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